Religious Experience and Journal of Mrs. Jarena Lee
Chapter 4.6 – The Subject of My Call to Preach Renewed
From this place I next went to Dennis Creek meeting house, where at the invitation of an elder, I spoke to a large congregation of various and conflicting sentiments, when a wonderful shock of God’s power was felt, shown everywhere by groans, by sighs, and loud and happy amens. I felt as if aided from above. My tongue was cut loose, the stammerer spoke freely; the love of God, and of his service, burned with a vehement flame within me—his name was glorified among the people.
I had my little son with me, and was very much straitened for money—and not having means to procure my passage home, I opened a School, and taught eleven scholars, for the purpose of raising a small sum. For many weeks I knew not what to do about returning home, when the Lord came to my assistance as I was rambling in the fields meditating upon his goodness, and made known to me that I might go to the city of Philadelphia, for which place I soon embarked with a very kind captain. We had a perilous passage—a dreadful storm arose, and before leaving the Delaware bay, we had a narrow escape from being run down by a large ship. But the good Lord held us in the hollow of his hand, and in the afternoon of Nov. 12, 1821, we arrived at the city.
Here I held meetings in the dwelling house of sister Lydia Anderson, and for about three months had as many appointments as I could attend. We had many precious seasons together, and the Lord was with his little praying band, convincing and converting sinners to the truth. I continued in the city until spring, when I felt it impressed upon my mind to travel, and walked fourteen miles in company with a sister to meet with some ministers, there to assemble, from Philadelphia. Satan tempted me while on the way, telling me that I was a fool for walking so far, as I would not be permitted to preach. But I pursued my journey, with the determination to set down and worship with them. When I arrived, a goodly number of people had assembled, and no preacher. They waited the time to commence the exercises, and then called upon me. I took the 3d chapter John, 14th verse for my text. I had life and liberty, and the Lord was in the camp with a shout. Another meeting was appointed three miles from there, when I spoke from Psalms cxxxvii, 1, 2, 3, 4. My master was with me, and made manifest his power. In the County House, also, we held a meeting, and had a sweet waiting upon the Lord. I spoke from Hebrews ii, 3, when the Lord gave me peculiar liberty. At a dwelling house one night I spoke from John vii, 46, when six souls fell to the floor crying for mercy. We had a blessed outpouring of the spirit among us—the God of Jacob was in our midst—and the shout of heaven-born souls was like music to our ears.
About the month of February my little son James, then in his sixth year, gave evidence of having religious inclinations. Once he got up in a chair, with a hymn book in his hand, and with quite a ministerial gesture, gave out a hymn. I felt the spirit move me to sing with him. A worthy sister was in the room, who I asked to pray for him. I invoked the Lord to answer and seal this prayer in the courts of heaven. I believed He would and did, and while yet on our knees I was filled with the fulness of God, and the answer came. I cried out in the joy of my heart—“The dead is alive”—and ran down stairs to inform a neighbor. Tears ran down the cheeks of my now happy boy, and great was our rejoicing together. He had been the subject of many prayers, and often had I thought I would rather follow him to his grave than to see him grow up an open and profane sinner like many children I had seen. And here let me say, the promise of the Lord is, “ask and ye shall receive.” Dear parents; pray for your children in childhood—carry them in the arms of faith to the mercy seat, and there present them an offering to the Lord. I can say from my own experience, the Lord will hear prayer. I had given James the Bible as Haman gave Samuel to God in his youth, and by his gracious favor he was received. For the further encouragement of fathers and mothers to engage in this blessed work, let me refer them to Ecclesiastes xi, 6: “In the morning sow thy seed, and in the evening withhold not thy hand, for thou knowest not whether shall prosper either this or that, or whether they both shall be alike good.”
In November I journeyed for Trenton, N. J. At Burlington I spoke to the
people on the Sabbath, and had a good time among them, and on Monday the
12th, in a School house. Sister Mary Owan, who had laid aside all the
cares of the world, went with me. We had no means of travelling but on
foot, but the Lord regarded us, and by some means put it into the heart
of a stranger, to convey us to the Trenton bridge. We fell in with the
elder of the circuit, who spoke to me in a cold and formal manner, and
as though he thought my capacity was not equal to his. We went into the
sister’s house, where we expected to stay, and waited a long while with
our hats and cloaks on, before the invitation to lodge there was given.
In the morning I had thought to visit Newhope, but remained to discharge
my duty in visiting the sick and afflicted three or four days in the
neighborhood. I was invited to a prayer meeting, and was called upon by a
brother to speak. I improved the offer, and made some remarks from Kings
xviii, 21. One of the preachers invited me to preach for them on sixth
day evening, which I complied with before an attentive congregation, when
God followed the word with much power, and great was our joy. On the 17th
I spoke in the morning at 11 o’clock. I felt my weakness and deficiency
for the work, and thought “who is able for these things,” and desired to
get away from the task. My text was Timothy vi, 2-7. The Lord again cut
loose the stammering tongue, and opened the Scriptures to my mind, so
that, glory to God’s dear name, we had a most melting, sin-killing, and
soul-reviving time. In the afternoon I assisted in leading a class, when
we found the Lord faithful and true—and on the same evening I spoke from
Hebrews ii, 3.
The next day, sister Mary Owan and myself set out for Newhope, where
we arrived, after walking sixteen miles, at about six o’clock in the
evening. Though tedious, it was a pleasant walk to view the high mountain
and towering hills, and the beauty and variety of nature around us,
which powerfully impressed my mind with the greatness and wisdom of my
Maker. At this place I stopt at the house of the gentleman with whose
wife’s mother I was brought up, and by whom we were agreeably received.
The next evening we called upon brother Butler, where I addressed a small
company, and God, through his words, quickened some. The next night I
spoke in an Academy to a goodly number of people, from John iii, 14. Here
I found some very ill-behaved persons, who talked roughly, and said among
other things, “I was not a woman, but a man dressed in female clothes.”
I labored one week among them, and went next to Lambertsville, where we
experienced kindness from the people, and had a happy time and parted in
tears.
I now returned to Philadelphia, where I stayed a short time, and went to
Salem, West Jersey. I met with many troubles on my journey, especially
from the elder, who like many others, was averse to a woman’s preaching.
And here let me tell that elder, if he has not gone to heaven, that I
have heard that as far back as Adam Clarke’s time, his objections to
female preaching were met by the answer—“If an ass reproved Balaam, and
a barn-door fowl reproved Peter, why should not a woman reprove sin?” I
do not introduce this for its complimentary classification of women with
donkeys and fowls, but to give the reply of a poor woman, who had once
been a slave. To the first companion she said—“May be a speaking woman
is like an ass—but I can tell you one thing, the ass seen the angel when
Balaam didn’t.”
Notwithstanding the opposition, we had a prosperous time at Salem. I
had some good congregations, and sinners were cut to the heart. After
speaking in the meeting house, two women came up into the pulpit, and
falling upon my neck cried out “What shall I do to be saved?” One said
she had disobeyed God, and he had taken her children from her—he had
called often after her, but she did not hearken. I pointed her to the
all-atoning blood of Christ, which is sufficient to cleanse from all
sin, and left her, after prayer, to his mercy. From this place I walked
twenty-one miles, and preached with difficulty to a stiff-necked and
rebellious people, who I soon left without any animosity for their
treatment. They might have respected my message, if not the poor weak
servant who brought it to them with so much labor.
“If they persecute you in one city, flee into another,” was the advice I
had resolved to take, and I hastened to Greenwich, where I had a lively
congregation, had unusual life and liberty in speaking, and the power of
God was there. We also had a solemn time in the meeting house on Sabbath
day morning, and in a dwelling house in the evening; a large company
assembled, when the spirit was with us, and we had a mighty shaking among
the dry bones.
On second day morning, I took stage and rode seven miles to Woodstown,
and there I spoke to a respectable congregation of white and colored,
in a school house. I was desired to speak in the colored meeting house,
but the minister could not reconcile his mind to a woman preacher—he
could not unite in fellowship with me even to shaking hands as christians
ought. I had visited that place before, when God made manifest his
power “through the foolishness of preaching,” and owned the poor old
woman. One of the brothers appointed a meeting in his own house, and
after much persuasion this minister came also. I did not feel much like
preaching, but spoke from Acts viii, 35. I felt my inability, and was led
to complain of weakness—but God directed the arrow to the hearts of the
guilty—and my friend the minister got happy, and often shouted “Amen,”
and “as it is, sister.” We had a wonderful display of the spirit of God
among us, and we found it good to be there. There is nothing too hard
for the Lord to do. I committed the meeting into the hands of the elder,
who afterwards invited me to preach in the meeting house. He had said he
did not believe that ever a soul was converted under the preaching of a
woman—but while I was laboring in his place, conviction seized a woman,
who fell to the floor crying for mercy. This meeting held till 12 or 1
o’clock. O how precious is the sound of Jesus’ name! I never felt a doubt
at this time of my acceptance with God, but rested my soul on his every
promise. The elder shook hands, and we parted.
Nov. 22, 1822, I returned to Philadelphia, and attended meetings in and
out of the city. God was still my help, and I preached and formed a
class, and tried to be useful. The oppositions I met with, however, were
numerous—so much so, that I was tempted to withdraw from the Methodist
Church, lest some might go into ruin by their persecutions of me—but this
was allowed only to try my faithfulness to God. At times I was pressed
down like a cart beneath its shafts—my life seemed as at the point of the
sword—my heart was sore and pained me in my body. But the Lord knows how
to deliver the godly out of temptation, and to reserve the unjust till
the day of judgment to be punished. While relating the feelings of my
mind to a sister who called to see me, joy sprang up in my bosom that I
was not overcome by the adversary, and I was overwhelmed with the love
of God and souls. I embraced the sister in my arms, and we had a melting
time together. Oh how comforting it is to have the spirit of God bearing
witness with our spirits that we are his children in such dark hours!
When Satan appears to stop up our path,
And fill us with fears, we triumph by faith;
He cannot take from us, (tho’ oft he has tried,)
The soul cheering promise the Lord will provide.
He tells us we’re weak, our hope is in vain,
The good that we seek we ne’er shall obtain;
But when such suggestions our graces have tried,
This answers all questions, the Lord will provide.
